Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Marriage or cohabitation?
Many people believe that a couple should live together before they get married. Studies show that people that live together before marriage actually are at a higher divorce rate than those who don't live together before they get married. Cohabitation has become the ultimate alternative for marriage. Which isn't exactly a good thing. In fact, its quite a bad thing. People who cohabit often end up having little or no intention of getting married. People often cohabit with multiple people at different times, which sends the rate of people who will never get married through the roof. Multiple cohabitation s often lead to a failure in marriage once someone actually gets married and often are more aggressive spouses. Children almost always have the worst outcome from cohabited families. So couples who do move in together should have a high intention of getting married or should already be engaged or else the couple is in a very bad position of working out. Living together without being married can also lead to depression. Depression rates among couples who are not married is triple that of married couples. I believe that couples should get married before they move in together. Cohabiting used to be just for the poverty stricken and minorities of the country but in the past thirty years it has become more and more common among young adults. Its amazing to think about what used to be illegal in most of the US is now so common that no one thinks a thing of it anymore. In fact, its still illegal in some states but almost no one enforces the law. So in the end, is it better to cohabit or to get married? Well the decision is yours.
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Living with your significant other can be a tricky topic and a tricky situation. I do agree with your view on not cohabiting with multiple people and while reading your article link, I do also agree that living with someone outside of marriage when one has a child is not a good idea. Some points though I do not agree with at all.
ReplyDeleteI have lived with my boyfriend going on 7 months. Now we are probably different then some couples you speak of since we did discussed marriage and where we wanted to take the relationship before we officially moved in together. We even met with a couple’s counselor before we officially took this step. In my experience, living together has made us even stronger. It has made me realize that I can actually marry him and live with him.
When it comes to statistics I cannot say that I agree. Since the 70's divorce has been on the rise. Over half of marriages end in divorce but I do not agree or believe that a majority of that is due to living with someone before they get married. It is extremely easy and acceptable to get divorced now a day whereas before it was looked down upon.
We are all entitled to our opinions and I do think you have some valid points. In my opinion though I think if a couple is smart about it and is doing it for the right reasons, why does it matter? Why should a state have it illegal? We are a Country built on freedom and this is just one of the many perks to living here.